Things I've Come to Know

Coming to Vietnam has been an amazing adventure and a life changing experience. I am thankful and humbled this journey to bring Lucy home has brought me here. But, after being away from my children and home for almost 5 weeks, a few little things have occurred to me. I'm sure these thoughts probably wouldn't have entered my mind had I not been gone so long or at this particular time of year, so even as I write I don't want to seem ungrateful. Sometimes we need to be shown the blessings we enjoy through their absence.

First, I love staying home with our children. I have come to realize that the choice John and I made 12 years ago for me to set aside career plans per se and pursue the art of raising children full time was not only a sacrifice of possible earnings and worldly credibility, it was an amazing privilege. Being here I've come to see that being a "stay at home mom" is the fantasy of so many women who literally slave away up to 18 hours each day, 7 days a week to provide shelter and food for their families. These long work hours are still not enough to provide their children with formal education or the hope of a better future. I can see more clearly that our choice, while a sacrifice of sorts, was clearly not a choice that is in any way available to most of this world's mothers.

Second, I feel so incredibly overwhelmed to enjoy the comforts that we do as a family. We have a green patch of grass where our kids can play, a reliable automobile we can all fit safely inside of, a garden where I can grow tomatoes and lavender, and a lovely home that is saturated with my personal taste. We enjoy the bounty of commercialism in the access we have to delicious food, adequate and even "above grade" clothing, and a little free time to use at leisure. My kids, while they sometimes chose to, are not forced to play in the streets, and I am not forced to send them away to play while I work-unfortunately sometimes I forget that my kids ARE my work, and I send them to play anyway...We by no means go without, and I hope I have changed enough to remember this two or three weeks after I return to my life of comfort.

Also, I feel humbled to have choice concerning the size of my family and the way I raise my family. I can choose my own religion, and I can choose my political party. I can choose who to vote for, and I have the right to speak out for what I believe in. We Americans take this privilege completely for granted, and I hope I can amend this in my own life.

I have also come to appreciate even further the absolute blessing of education. My kids can go to school each day and learn. It is part of the package that comes with being an American. What's more, they are EXPECTED to be at school, and I am expected to get them there. My kids are just not capable of knowing the possibilities that lie before them because of their education. I so wish I could bring to my children the feelings I have had about the blessing of receiving an education.

I've learned I have true friends. So many have been so indulgent in reading these posts; so many have offered help in so many ways. As I was helping at the English class tonight one of the students asked me if I liked meeting people in Vietnam. I told this handsome young man that I felt that people were the greatest reason to live on this earth. That the opportunity to meet, help and love others is the greatest gift we have in this life. So many have given this gift to me. I feel so loved, so lifted, by so many of you. Thanks for making me feel so special, so valued-and through me showering Lucy, John and my entire family with the gift of YOU. Friendships are treasures, each priceless and worth keeping.

And Last, I absolutely love my family-my children, my husband, my parents (including my in-laws) my siblings and my nieces and nephews, grandparents and aunts and uncles, cousins and ancestors. One thing this culture teaches beautifully is that we totally owe the good we are to our family. I get to sit down and write this blog, while my mom slaves away in the states making sack lunches for my kids to eat at school. My sisters have come to my home-cleaned my house, tended my garden and played with my kids. John's mom has been invaluable in spending time with her grandkids when they've needed extra hugs and love. My dad has rearranged his busy work schedule to accommodate our being away so long. My grandparents have sent encouraging emails, my aunts and cousins too. John, of course, is my greatest source of strength and support. He is the most unselfish individual I have ever known, and he has shown me pure love throughout my life with him. He placed faith in me as we waded through years of trying to find this little Graham, and his support has never wavered.

We have been held up by our family-they have placed faith in us that Lucy is meant to be a Graham and with that faith in us alone they have loved her without meeting her. They are my greatest source of support and strength, aside from my personal faith in Jesus Christ and the comfort and guidance of the Holy Ghost in my life. My greatest gift, my pearl of great price, is my family.

These are things that I now know-and for these things alone I will always be thankful for 5 weeks spent in Vietnam.